You Might Be A Weight Lifter if......
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1. You cut the collars out of all of your workout shirts.
2. You wear shorts that are tighter than most womens shorts.
3. All of your workout clothes resemble a zebra for some reason.
4. You drink more water than a camel in the middle of a drought.
5. You wear some kind of big utility work boot when you lift.
6. You know where the best mirror is in the gym that shows your definition.
7. You tend to do most of your workouts in front of #6.
8. You literally read Bodybuilding magazines cover to cover.
9. You have face wrinkles from intense grunting and straining that normal
people don’t have.
10. You have no idea what supplements to take.
11. Your monthly supplement bill is more than your monthly mortgage.
12. If you happen to wake up at 3:00 a.m., you make yourself a protein shake.
13. You start lifting earlier than the U.S. military even gets out of bed.
14. You take 30 minutes loading 45 pound plates on the leg press machine
when you do legs.
15. You tend to run instead of sprint, jog instead of run, speed walk
instead of jog, walk instead of speed walk, sit instead of walk,
lay down instead of sit, nap instead of lay down and sleep instead
of nap just to give yourself more rest and recuperation time to grow.
16. You have more bikini’s than your wife or girlfriend.
17. You can’t stop yourself from squeezing a front abdominal shot in the
18. Mirror when you are the only one in a public restroom.
19. You do # 17 even with people in the restroom and ask them what they think
19. Your wife or girlfriend has more body hair than you do.
20. Your abdominals are super ripped, but for some reason this area is so
bloated that it bulges out further than your chest.
21. You hate 13 page magazine information articles on new supplements. [ ] [ ] [ ]
22. Eight of your buddies have to sit on top of the leg press machine when
you do legs. [ ] [ ] [ ]
23. Donkey calf raises don’t embarrass you anymore. [ ] [ ] [ ]
24. You prefer black and white photos of yourself instead of color. [ ] [ ] [ ]
25. You appear in 4 out of 8 major Bodybuilding magazines each month. [ ] [ ] [ ]
26. You camp out in front of the book store waiting for the new
Bodybuilding magazines to hit the shelf. [ ] [ ] [ ]
27. You know that watching T.V. and eating protein powder won’t make your
muscles grow. [ ] [ ] [ ]
28. You own part of a major supplement company or nutrition franchise. [ ] [ ] [ ]
29. You endorse supplements that you wouldn’t even use yourself. [ ] [ ] [ ]
30. When you were in the military and had to deploy over seas, you packed
tons of tuna in your luggage. [ ] [ ] [ ]
31. Your workout now takes 1 hour or less compared to when you use to lift for
3 hours a day every day. [ ] [ ] [ ]
32. You know where the best corner of the gym is where the light above you
shows off all of your serration’s the best. [ ] [ ] [ ]
33. People stop working out and watch you as you do your dead lifts. [ ] [ ] [ ]
34. You need 2 spotters when you do squats. [ ] [ ] [ ]
35. You pose more than 20 times a day in any mirror available. [ ] [ ] [ ]
36. You boil eggs 3 dozen at a time. [ ] [ ] [ ]
37. You eat tuna and rice for breakfast. [ ] [ ] [ ]
38. You have to tan year around. [ ] [ ] [ ]
39. You listen to punk music on your walkman during your leg and dead lift
days. [ ] [ ] [ ]
40. You have realized and accepted that your “partying” days are now over. [ ] [ ] [ ]
41. You eat 6 to 9 meals a day. [ ] [ ] [ ]
42. You know the gram count of every known protein food source on the
planet. [ ] [ ] [ ]
43. A rice cake contains more water in it than you do on the day of your
competition. [ ] [ ] [ ]
44. Even your butt has serration’s on it. [ ] [ ] [ ]
45. Your veins look like a road atlas of the U.S. [ ] [ ] [ ]
46. Your wife/husband or girlfriend/boyfriend just up and left you one day. [ ] [ ] [ ]
47. You have thrown up after doing heavy legs. [ ] [ ] [ ]
48. You dry heave after doing heavy legs. [ ] [ ] [ ]
49. You REALLY can’t straighten out your elbows. [ ] [ ] [ ]
50. Your triceps sit out at 45 degree angles from resting on your huge lats. [ ] [ ] [ ]
51. Your tailoring costs more than your suits themselves. [ ] [ ] [ ]
52. You have to buy 40” waist slacks to accommodate your legs and have it
tailored into a 32” waist. [ ] [ ] [ ]
53. You weigh more than 275 lbs. in the off season. [ ] [ ] [ ]
54. You own 5 blenders and they all work. [ ] [ ] [ ]
55. You use a 12 volt cigarette plug in blender for when you are traveling. [ ] [ ] [ ]
56. You wish you could sleep more during the day. [ ] [ ] [ ]
57. You own or work at a gym. [ ] [ ] [ ]
58. You know every muscle in the body by scientific name as well as the
correct spellings. [ ] [ ] [ ]
59. You drink steak and tuna shakes. [ ] [ ] [ ]
60. You take 9 times the daily recommended dosages on all of the
supplements that you take. [ ] [ ] [ ]
61. You can count by “45’s” up to 2000,……………even while drunk. [ ] [ ] [ ]
62. You know that a hip sled isn’t used in the snow. [ ] [ ] [ ]
63. You have to stay downstairs for 2 days after doing legs. [ ] [ ] [ ]
64. Your friends call you “FREAK”. [ ] [ ] [ ]
65. You wear jewelry with dumb bells and plates on them. [ ] [ ] [ ]
66. You have realized that you will now have to eat like this for as long as you
want to stay this big. [ ] [ ] [ ]
67. You tend to buy smallish shirts. [ ] [ ] [ ]
68. Your workout shorts are almost “Daisy Dukes”. [ ] [ ] [ ]
69. It seems that because of competitions, you travel more than you are home. [ ] [ ] [ ]
70. The middle of your chest has grown together and is now one huge pec
muscle. [ ] [ ] [ ]
71. Your torso resembles a flying “V” guitar. [ ] [ ] [ ]
72. You always wear shorts under your pants just in case you have to flex a
front quad pose. [ ] [ ] [ ]
73. You cut the sleeves off of all of your shirts. [ ] [ ] [ ]
74. Your hands are more callused than a bricklayer. [ ] [ ] [ ]
75. Your traps require you to buy extra long shirts. [ ] [ ] [ ]
76. You know that “Amino” isn’t a Spanish word for friend. [ ] [ ] [ ]
77. You have memorized all of the Branch Chain Amino Acid (BCAA) names
and their correct spellings. [ ] [ ] [ ]
78. The gym you go to has dumb bells up to 150 pounds. [ ] [ ] [ ]
79. You constantly write to Bodybuilding magazines. [ ] [ ] [ ]
80. They have published your questions or comments in #79. [ ] [ ] [ ]
81. Your butt is as hard as your biceps. [ ] [ ] [ ]
82. You do or would lift at the airport gym if your delay was more than 2 hrs. [ ] [ ] [ ]
83. You can’t drive after your leg workout. [ ] [ ] [ ]
84. You no longer worry about HOW MUCH you can lift. [ ] [ ] [ ]
85. You have several book cases full of old Bodybuilding magazines. [ ] [ ] [ ]
86. Getting “ripped” for you does not include drugs or alcohol. [ ] [ ] [ ]
87. The bar bends as you mount it when doing heavy squats. [ ] [ ] [ ]
88. You load 45’s when doing curls. [ ] [ ] [ ]
89. You have seen stars while doing heavy leg presses. [ ] [ ] [ ]
90. You know that your only 2 choices are vanilla or chocolate. [ ] [ ] [ ]
91. You can’t pose for a picture without pushing your tricep against your lat. [ ] [ ] [ ]
92. You flex and over dramatize your hand gestures as you give somebody
directions. [ ] [ ] [ ]
93. You are the only one who uses the squat rack for squats. [ ] [ ] [ ]
94. You tend to wear shorts on cold days. [ ] [ ] [ ]
95. You can’t understand why people ask you to see your biceps and then
ask you how much you bench. How about, let me see your chest and
how much can you bench, or let me see your biceps and how much can
curl. [ ] [ ] [ ]
96. You have protruding veins on body parts that never use to be there. [ ] [ ] [ ]
97. Your food taste like card board. [ ] [ ] [ ]
98. You have a personalized weight belt. [ ] [ ] [ ]
99. You need wrist straps on all pulling movements. [ ] [ ] [ ]
100. You wish “ALL” body parts grew from lifting. [ ] [ ] [ ]
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